Let People Have a Bad Day.

So much for all my time management. I was running late, I had a bus to catch at 12.30 and the only way I was going to make it was to put my head down and run like the blazes. So there I was, my long lanky legs trying to move faster than they had moved in a long time. As I approached the bus stop, my chest felt like it was being soundly beaten with a rather large mallet.

The bus pulled up, the doors opened and I hopped onto the bus to be met by a very sullen bus driver.
"Phew",I sighed, "I just made it and no more!"
Silence.
"That was a tough run.", I continued.
More silence.
"How much is a single journey to the village of Killyleagh?"
A rather annoyed glare from the bus driver as he reached down for his list of fares.
"Three pounds fifty." he grumbled back at me.

I handed him the money and headed into the bus to find a seat. Who did he think he was? I should have said something to him! I should have complained about his attitude. How dare he treat me like that! These were all the thoughts that were running, hot tempered through my head.

I eventually found a free seat beside a smiling elderly woman. She greeted me with a warm "Hello sonny". I calmed down a little. I then told her about the attitude of the bus driver. I told her about how it had gotten my blood boiling. She looked at me calmly, rested her hand on my arm and with a warm compassionate smile said

"We all have bad days. Let him have his."

This one sentence totally changed the way I was feeling. We are all only human. We all indeed have our bad days. If someone is rude to you, or has a bad attitude towards you, remember it most likely has nothing to do with you. Do not take it personally. They might be having their bad day. Do not let it get to you. Learn to shrug your shoulders and let them have their bad day. You will be a much happier and calmer person.

Good Luck,
Allen

Stress is Relative - Be careful how you THINK!

We all think our problems are the most important problems in the world. It amazes me how a lot of people seem to get caught up in their everyday activities, so much so that small issues can be blown out of all proportion. Let me give you an example.

I work in a city center office, parking spaces are a premium commodity and they cost a small fortune. My place of work uses a "discount" parking area about a fifteen minute walk from the office. When I say it is a parking area, it is - in fact - an area of waste ground that used to be a gas works. Said waste ground has had loose stone chippings strewn over the area as a temporary service and it is run by a small community operation. The guys who look after the car park on a daily basis are down to earth and they would otherwise be unemployed if it were not for this "project".

It is a fairly simple operation and they just guide the cars into unmarked parking places. Most people's car parking is pre-paid and there is plenty of room for everyone to park. The place virtually runs itself.

You would think it wouldn't be a stressful job! Well the other day I was parking the car, when one of the guys at the car park was freaking out!

"Look where that person is going! I didn't tell them to go there.. and I have a person here who needs to pay... UGGGG I'm so stressed... I feel like I need to be cut in two so I can be in two places at once!!!", he cried.

It really made me think. We all think OUR jobs are the most important. OUR tasks are almost life and death activities. OUR stress is the worst. Oh I wish I was cut in two so I could be in two places at once!!

Well it usually isn't life or death (unless you are a medic of course). Our day is usually filled with small events that WE blow out of proportion. That WE think is so important at the time. Take a few minutes to look around you and you will realize no matter how menial the job or position people have - they can get stressed.

You can find stressed out garbage men, stressed out janitors, stressed out office cleaners! It does not matter what we actually DO. It is how WE THINK about a situation that causes us stress.

So ask yourself today. What do I blow out of proportion? Is the thing I am currently stressed about REALLY that important or am I giving it far too much importance. Let me know how you get on and remember. It is how we think, not what we do that makes us stressed.

Thanks,
Allen

Writers Block ...

I've had a bad case of writers block this past while but I have been doing lots of research for my book..


Its all hard work let me tell you. Writing a book is no joke! Thankfully I have an understanding publisher.

Hope you are all well....

Allen

Killyleagh on TV Tonight

My home town of Killyleagh is on BBC One UK tonight.. They used the location for shooting scenes of a castle!

See http://www.bbc.co.uk/bbcone/ for more detail...

Happy New Year - Random acts of Kindness

Hello Readers,


As you may have noticed, I have been very quiet of late. A lot has been going on in the background and I am confident 2008 will be an exciting year for Self Help For Lazy People.

I was driving home yesterday amidst a flood caused by a thaw of snow. We came to a big enough pool of water that stretch the entire width of the road. We watched as the car ahead of us passed safely through the water and then to my surprise the car stopped and waited. The driver waited to make sure we passed through the water safely.

It made me think. Would I have stopped for the driver behind me (there were no drivers behind me in this case). I thought to myself probably not!

I thanked the driver by flashing my headlights as we completed are traverse of the water. It was an act of kindness that also reminded me to be kind to others.

So don't forget dear readers! Your actions affect others! If you can be kind to others your actions can have a domino effect as the person who received the kindness then, in turn, is inspired to help others.

What acts of kindness have inspired you this holidays season?

Allen

Alternate Nostral Breathing - A Relaxation Technique Revisted..

Since I am out injured - here is an article from the archives that you might find useful.

be well...

Allen


About ten years ago I went on a Yoga course at the Scandinavian Yoga and Meditation School and was taught this relaxation technique.

I was a little skeptical at first but its a really effective way to calm frazzled nerves! I find it effective in that you are actually DOING something PHYSICAL rather than just some form of MENTAL relaxation. Meditation etc. can be very hard to do when you are feeling stressed and it is more something to do on a regular basis as a preventative measure against stress. I view Alternate Nostril Breathing as a first aid technique for a person who is ALREADY stressed. So look beyond the yogic mysticism and see a very effective relaxation technique.

This is what Holistic Online has to say about it:

If you don't do anything else, this is a simple yoga breathing exercise that can be done virtually anywhere, anyplace. You will be glad you did.!

With this exercise, we breathe through only one nostril at a time. The logic behind this exercise is that normal breathing does alternate from one nostril to the other at various times during the day.

Benefits

- The exercise produces optimum function to both sides of the brain: that is optimum creativity and optimum logical verbal activity. This also creates a more balanced person, since both halves of the brain are functioning property.

- The yogis consider this to be the best technique to calm the mind and the nervous system.


1. Close the right nostril with your right thumb and inhale through the left nostril. Do this to the count of four seconds.
2. Immediately close the left nostril with your right ring finger and little finger, and at the same time remove your thumb from the right nostril, and exhale through this nostril. Do this slowly and in a relaxed manner. This completes a half round.
3. Inhale through the right nostril to the count of four seconds. Close the right nostril with your right thumb and exhale through the left nostril slowly and in a relaxed manner. This completes one full round.

Start by doing three rounds, adding one per week until you are doing seven rounds.

Alternate nostril breathing should not be practiced if you have a cold or if your nasal passages are blocked in any way.

For details on this exercise please visit HERE.

Good Luck!,
Allen

Frozen Shoulder ....

Hello all..

A very quick apology for lack of posts. I have been off work with a frozen shoulder and I have not been able to blog either.


As soon as I am well I will upload a lot of posts. I have a lot of (I hope) useful articles for you all.

Be well...

Allen